Photo by Chris Owens
Every week I’ll pose a question for you to share your experiences and tips. If you have a question that you’d like me to post, I’d love to hear from you!
Saving money has always been important to me, even when I was a teenager, but I wouldn’t consider myself “cheap.” I happen to love Starbucks, especially the seasonal pumpkin spice latte, and there are other quality items I’m willing to pay more for, even if it’s not always the most frugal choice.
I recently stumbled across this definition of a “ghetto latte”, made by ordering an iced espresso and then filling up the cup with the free milk at the condiment station to make a latte for half the cost, and I wondered where the line between frugal and cheap is drawn.
Where do you draw the line between being frugal and just being cheap? How would you define being cheap? Do you think ghetto lattes (and other similar hacks) are dishonest, or is it just the same as taking advantage of loss leaders to build a stockpile of free products? Weigh in here.
Join the discussion — add your two cents to previous Ask DSM Readers questions too!
Susan
“Smile, you’re saving a lot of money.” It’s easy to make a typo when you have so very much to type. Thanks for a great site! :-)
Heidi
Thank you! That was driving me crazy too. :)
But to answer the question – I try not to be cheap. Cheap is when you buy something that’s $2 to give away as a gift simply because it only costs $2 and without any thought into it. Frugal is when you buy something that would normally cost $50 but managed to get it for $5 and know that someone would love it.
I think that’s the difference – the thought behind it.
Tara Kuczykowski
LOL, that wasn’t my photo — it was just a funny illustration, but I don’t want to detract from the question, so I changed it.
Frugalapolis
Frugal is saving money by making do with what you have, getting a deal or sale, etc. Cheap is saving money at the expense of others. If some other entity is picking up the cost of your savings – you’re being cheap. The example above about the latte and adding milk is cheap. If you brought your own milk to add, its frugal.
Kimberly
Some other person or entity is always paying the price for another person’s deal. If another person isn’t buying high markup items and balancing out someone who buys loss leaders only, then for a time the company will pay but eventually it will get passed to all consumers.
melissa
nicely said Frugalapolis
Suzette
If you are breaking any rules, written or unwritten, that is cheap. If you are frugal, you make your own late at home, or get one at a gas station.
Randy
Hmmm, I don’t think there is anything wrong with being Frugal or Cheap. But what you describe is being dishonest! It isok to be cheap or frugal but it is never OK to be dishonest!!!
Andrea K.
ok, just for argument’s sake, tho…what if you’re not making yourself a “ghetto latte” as such. what if you’ve purchased a coffee and like 5 sugars and 2 milks in each one. to some that would be dishonest. you meant nothing by it, it’s just your preference. is one then “frugal” whereas the one attempting to create a latte “cheap”? is the definition really dependent on the motive??
i’m asking in honesty here. because really the definitions of the terms would move with the definer. buying loss leaders is costing someone. adding milk cups is costing someone. it’s there, tho, and isn’t a rule written or unwritten. maybe i’ve taken the question too seriously!! LOL
Damsel
Frugalapolis, I agree about the distinction being whether or not you’re hurting anyone else.
I also think you are cheap if you NEVER put the results of your frugality to good use, for your own enjoyment and/or the enjoyment of those closest to you. For me, I’m frugal in 90% of my life so that I can splurge with no guilt in the other 10% in a way that is FUN for me and my family.
I understand the need for financial security – that’s why we have cash in the bank. It’s complicated – I love that feeling of security, but to save and save and save and save and never enjoy the results of your hard work seems miserly to me.
Kimberly
Dishonest? Hardly.
If you use a half a cup of half and half then yes, you’ve pushed it too far, and getting the drink in a larger to go cup just for this purpose is a little shady.
But getting an iced coffee (Starbucks regular coffee is plenty strong enough to make one of these) and putting in a reasonable amount of half and half and sugar isn’t dishonest or even poor behavior. (I’ve never actually done this, because I usually drink plain black or go for a peppermint mocha.)
I feel like sometimes people who identify as frugal are eager to draw bright lines, like that’s so dishonest and awful I would *never* do that, more so than the average person.
For the most part, I’m concerned about where my internal line is. I would probably go out of my way to go to an independent coffee shop and err on the side of overpaying – but if you tell me you dressed up your Starbucks iced coffee I’m not really concerned.
Nicole
I get a venti iced coffee, sweetened with a bit of room. I add half and half (and sometimes the chocolate poweder) and grab a couple spendas, too. That’s how I like my drink. I’ve never even though about it as stealing or anything! lol
Leighann
I don’t regularly go to starbucks because it’s so expensive and we just don’t have splurge money. However, the idea of going there, getting a drink and using the products they put out there to be used doesn’t bother me at all. It is the same theory of going to a gas station and getting coffee, and using their creamers and sugars in your coffee; some people use more, some people use less, some people don’t use any at all, so it evens out.
I don’t see any difference between being frugal and being cheap. I think they’re both good traits to have.
Nilufer
I know right?!?! I only drink coffee when it has dessert qualities (ie I need tons of cream and sugar, so much that it really no longer is coffee) I think my definition of cheap is when your intentions are bad, like trying to take advantage of someone. I know people who have changed price tags on clothing… that, I think, is dishonest and cheap.
Terri
I agree with Frugalopolis. I think the primary difference between frugal and cheap is how it affects others. Even in your donations to charities and other organizations. You can be frugal and save $5 on an item for yourself and that’s a good thing. When you deduct that same $5 from what you would do or give to others, that’s just being cheap.
Liz
My opinion is a bit biased due to a friend’s experience. He operates a family-owned coffee shop, and has been paying out a lot in milk and half-and-half costs due to people loading up at the condiment station. Sometimes I think it helps to stop and consider things from the owner’s point of view. They probably don’t want to have to put out a tacky sign to deter cheapskates, but does the lack of a sign make it okay? I say no, but that’s just me… :)
Ang B F
I don’t think Tara was talking about simply adding creamers or sweeteners. I think it is the idea to buy something and use a HUGE amount of condiments to make your drink into something else on the menu. I am not going to go to a restaurant that offers a burger bar (condiments to put on your burger), and order the cheapest item I can in order to get a plate, then proceed to make a big salad out of the lettuce and other items on the burger bar. When you are purchasing an item and using an abundance of free items to make it into an entirely different item…then I think it is shady. If I purchase a coffee and add creamer and sugar, I am still leaving with a coffee. If I purchase an expresso shot and add half a cup of milk, sugar, flavored syrup, etc and leave with an entirely different item than I purchased then it is wrong…particularly if the item I am leaving with is offered on the menu…just my opinion.
Amy
Well-said!
Lindsay
What this is really coming down to form most people is ethics. Personally would I go into a mom and pop shop and use a ton of their “free” conditment’s? No. Would I do the same if it was a Starbucks that has hundreds of coffee shops all across the US charging too much for coffee? Maybe, but I don’t think I would go as far as the “ghetto” latte drink, but I may take a little more cream, sugar or what ever. For these large chain stores, most of the time the “free” condiment usuage balances out, like Leighann said, but I know the same isn’t true for mom and pop shops. To me frugal is getting a great deal on something, like (since we’re talking about food and drinks) using a buy one get one free coupon at a resturant, cheap is taking hand fulls of “free” ketchup packets home to fill up your ketchup bottle :)
Crunchy Deal
I always think that if it feels wrong to you, then it probably is. If you feel absolutely 100% no shame in using what there is to use, then go for it. But if you feel that it would be inappropriate and you are trying to take advantage, then it’s probably not a good idea. I would suggest not going to Starbucks unless you are going to splurge a little . . . there are plenty of other places to pinch pennies but at Starbucks it’s hard to pinch one!!! Everytime I go into Starbucks I mentally prepare myself to spend $5 on a cup.
Erin
I understand what your saying. And all we can do is be held accountable for ourselves BUT there in lies the problem. for so many, weather they chose to define themselves as ‘frugal’ or ‘cheap’ or whatever other label they wish to add, there are so many other ppl out there not caring and not thinking about about any label just thinking about themselves and that is what gives many who truely have to live a certain way just to survive a bad name. Making a Ghetto latte is just that Ghetto and driving around a Hummer but switching price tags and fighting with cashier when you know your being dishonest is just the same. But taking the bus to the store after you have dumpster dived for certain coupons and then being told your taking advantage of say that rice or potatoes coupon is just plain wrong of society. We coupons users should feel blessed to even be able to afford any coupons and any saving we get should be put in perspective. Think about that family that truely only has money for rice and potatoes and has never even seen the inside of a starbucks and not just because like my family thinks its a totally ridiculous thing to splurge on when anything they have at that place you can make at your own home and for a fraction of the cost.
Sorry if this offends anyone but having been on both sides of this sometimes my opinions and emotions can run strong.
Erin
I just wanted to say please don’t get me wrong I’m not attacking starbucks customers and I realize it started to sound that way. To each his own. Lets just try to remember ALL our fellow men when we engage in this type of judging what we feel is right and wrong.
Cathy K
I find this fairly simple.Why do you think Mcdonalds charges for extra condiments and adds the cream and sugar into your coffee for you. These extras cost companies money. However, if they are going to leave them out for us to consume freely, well that is frugal not cheap!
rachel
Here’s a question to envoke a little thought…Why is Starbuck’s charging the consumer for the condiments that they offer for free anyway? The answer, of course is because someone else is servicing you and putting it in your drink for you.
Imma just going to put it out there because I’m cheap and frugal when the situation calls for it–it all comes down to stewardship. If someone gives me something that I’m not going to use but, I know someone that would use it everyday and love it, heck yes, I’m going to regift it. If I score some products for free and am unable to use them all before the expiration date’s up, I’m going to give it to someone rather than see it go bad. I avoid places like Starbuck’s like the plague except for a treat beacause, personally, I can think of better ways to enjoy my money. Cheap, frugal, whatever. My mortagage will be paid off in less than 15 years, my car will be paid off this year, we have our needs covered and we give to others. Now, pass the half and half:)
AC
Making a ghetto latte sounds liek a cheap thing to do but really is the epitomy of being frugal. Condiments and other “freebies” are there for the use of paying customers. If you buy something you have every right to use the gratis items. It’s not being dishonest at all. If you were to just walk in and take those items to use at home that would be cheap and dishonest. As long as you paid for something, you are a customer and therefore entitled. I would agree with the reader who said the difference depends on intention and quality of merchandise. Getting a good deal on good merchandise is just smart (frgual), buying something cheap and of low quality because you’re too cheap to spend money is cheap.
Erin
but what if you dont have the money to spend.. so because someone buys something you consider Cheap and lower guality becuase thats all they can afford they are cheap. but becuase you have the money to spend more but get a good deal your frugal??? that reasoning I don’t understand
Amy
Without going into all of the coffee/burger condiments, I believe the frugal vs. cheap debate comes down to, “do unto others.”
If the way you act or something you do is what you would want done to you, then I’m sure it is fine to go ahead and do it.
If it is something you would prefer not be done to you, then I would reconsider my actions.
For example, buying items for “free” at CVS is frugal, not cheap. Cheap (and wrong), is having multiple ECB cards and clearing the shelves.
Using a legitimate coupon for a free item at a restaurant or store is frugal. Cheap would be not leaving a tip at the restaurant.
Adding a little bit of water at the end of your detergent bottle to make it last a little longer is frugal.
I saw somewhere else a comment about taking extra napkins from a fast food joint and stashing them in the glove compartment for later use. With three kids, I always take extra napkins from fast food joints for those, “just in case,” times. But, I also keep wipes in my car for all of the other times. I don’t do my “napkin shopping” at the local Mickey D’s, lol! To me, both of these scenarios are simply smart and frugal. The napkins are there for customers to use… and who wouldn’t pack extra napkins with take-out? You just never know what kind of spill might happen.
Again, in my opinion, it comes down to, “do unto others.”
If you would want people taking an entire container of napkins at your home/store, clearing the shelves at your local CVS store, or buying a freebie at a restaurant and not leaving a tip, then fine. You do it.
Otherwise, I would stop and think… and take the high, narrow road.
-Amy
Nicole
The ghetto latte is just flat out wrong, dishonest, sneaky, quite frankly stealing.
Here are 2 points:
1. intentionally over using the free milk at a coffee place is not different then filling your purse up with ketchup packets at McDonalds.
2. It is no different than going to a friends house and using the restroom…they have toilet paper out for you to use, free of charge, but that doesn’t mean you have rights to take the whole roll home with you.
Some Lucky Dog
Ditto!! And just because Starbucks is more expensive than your local coffee shop doesn’t make it right to do it there…
Another View
I do not understand why some people view this as stealing. Realistically, it costs Starbucks some change to make your drink, yet they charge you $3-5. Trust me when I say, you have paid for your drink plus several others. And trust me when I say you are paying for the extra milk you use. I feel like it has already been paid for in the price of the item I purchased. I feel like going to McDonalds and taking 30 packs of ketchup when you won’t be using 30 is wrong. But making a drink at Starbucks that you will consume right then…there is nothing wrong with that. Everyone thinks its being dishonest and are saying do unto others and stuff, but how about the fact that Starbucks is making so much off of your orders? Are they doing unto us? I dont think so.
Just another perspective…
AC
Thank you! I don’t see why people think it’s stealing either. It’s being added to a drink just as it would be added to a plain black coffee. Basically it’s like they’re saying if it didn’t come in the drink you ordered it’s wrong to use it.
*Not that the latte scenario was the main point of this whole discussion, but I think it’s odd some of the responses I’ve been reading to it.
OrangeMommie
I used to work at Starbucks and was once a manager when I was there. I did feel it was dishonest to order a double espresso in an iced venti cup and then go to the condiment bar and use all our milk to make an iced latte. The real people I felt sorry for were all of the honest customers. They ended up paying the price with price increases.
I saw all kinds of scams at Starbucks. There were regular “complainers” who would demand free drink coupons even when they paid with a free drink coupon. Again, the regular people that never complained and put up with the longer line from the demanding customers were the ones that paid the price.
I guess the way I see it is that this is the world we live in. Some people are honest and there are those that are dishonest. In the end, it is up to God and the person to make this straight. It isn’t mine to judge or to try and correct the situation.
Kris
I think you make a good point OrangeMommie.
I think the ghetto latte is wrong. If you want a latte and you want a Starbucks latte, pay the Starbucks price for a latte.
Lacey Clauson
Well said Amy! I love these questions.
emmaoforange
I agree that the “ghetto latte” is dishonest.
For those that don’t, or don’t drink lattes, I just wanted to point out that a latte is not just a little bit of extra milk or half and half, it is 80 to 90% milk.
Teresa
I haven’t read all of the comments, but my measure for frugal/cheap is who’s paying my bills. Someone may think it’s cheap, but they aren’t paying my bills. I call all savings “frugal” since I’m the one paying the bills. If I have trouble at a store with my coupons, get rolled eyes or huffs from the line behind me or whatever the discomfort may be, I remind myself, I’m paying the bills, they aren’t and they can simply deal with it. All the while smiling and pleasant.
Chris M.
The ghetto latte reminds me a lot of ghetto lemonade I used to make in college. You order a glass of ice water at a restaurant and when they ask if you want lemon, you say “yes, extra lemon, please.” And then you squeeze all those lemon wedges into your water, add a little sugar, and voila! Ghetto lemonade.
So here’s my perspective. If people are reduced to making ghetto lattes and ghetto lemonades, perhaps the restaurant/coffee shop is charging too much for the real thing? I feel like prices keep going up, up, up while income levels are stagnant or falling. I’m not saying it’s right, but if money’s tight and it’s all you can afford, I don’t have a problem with it.
Beth
Im a proud,frugal couponer!! Not a cheapskate. I wouldn’t napkin shop @ McD’s but would take the few extras we had at our table.I think ppl who rinse out the same coffee cup,and use for a year for free refills is stealing!!! Starbucks thing-not sure!
OrangeMommie
Not to mention it is disgusting. I used to cringe when someone handed me a nasty cup they had rinsed out days in a row. All to get a “refill” price. I can only imagine the germs in that cup. . . .
lynne powell
Frugal means watching what you spend. When I go to a restaurant & order a cup of coffee, I get cream, milk, sugar (or their counterparts) free, so I can have a drink I enjoy. When I go to Starbucks or an equivalent coffee shop, I should be able to order an iced coffee with cream & sugar, and not have it cost me a fortune because it is now a latte. Honestly, I have been places where they do not offer milk or cream/creamer to add to your coffee. Those places are crossed off my return list. After all, I put milk or creamer in my coffee at home, so why would I not want it elsewhere? This isn’t “cheap”, it is about being a satisfied customer, and about value for what I am receiving.
Sam
Ice espresso and add your own milk! Dang, I’ve never even have heard of that, lol. Might have to try it. I don’t think there is anything wrong with being cheap or frugal. Cheap is only bad when you always take advantage of others giving, for example: let’s say you always go out to eat and your friend always pays for your meal, but you never return the favor by paying for her meals. To me that is cheap! Not returning the kind of favors of others.
Sam
I must add making a ghetto latte isn’t stealing or being cheap. Hell, you paid for the espresso, which in reason is probably cheap for Starbucks to buy, but being Starbucks they up-charge the price. So, in terms they are probably making more off of that espresso, to buy not only the espresso but it can also pay for that milk you are pouring into your “ghetto latte”. If you’re stealing items that’s being cheap.
Sarah
Ghetto latte = stealing
It’s not cheap, it’s just plain theft.
Sarah
Sam, you may have paid for the espresso but you didn’t pay for the half-pint of milk you used to make your ghetto latte. That’s just stealing. No two ways about it.